🌿The Healing Power of Resting and Unplugging
Some mornings, you open your eyes and the weight is already there. Not the blanket, not the room—the heaviness in your chest.
The hard days have a way of sneaking in. Maybe you had a good day yesterday—one where you almost felt normal—and today you can barely find the energy to brush your teeth.
If you’ve been through divorce or loss, these days might feel endless. They can trick you into thinking you’re broken, like everyone else has moved on and you’re still standing in place.
But here’s what I want you to know: you’re not broken, and these days aren’t proof you’ve failed at healing.
They’re proof you’re human. And humans have hard days.
This isn’t a post about “snapping out of it.” It’s a soft landing place. It’s a reminder that sometimes, the most healing thing you can do isn’t pushing harder—it’s pausing. It’s resting. It’s unplugging from the noise so you can finally hear yourself again.
Because rest isn’t laziness. Rest isn’t giving up. Rest is one of the most courageous things you can give yourself—especially when the world keeps shouting, “Do more. Move faster. Get over it.”
Why We Resist Rest
If you’ve ever felt guilty for sitting down, you’re not alone.
Many of us were raised to think our worth is tied to what we produce: clean houses, finished work, checked-off to-do lists. When we slow down, that old voice whispers, You’re falling behind.
After divorce or loss, that guilt gets louder. You might think:
I should be healing faster.
I should be getting more done.
I should be “okay” by now.
But here’s the truth: grief takes up space in your body. Trauma burns energy, even when you’re sitting still. Rest isn’t wasted time—it’s how your body processes, repairs, and carries you forward.
Imagine you sprained your ankle. You wouldn’t berate yourself for putting your feet up. You’d know rest was necessary for healing.
Your heart and mind deserve the same care.
The Difference Between “Collapse” and True Rest
On hard days, you might already be doing something that looks like rest—lying on the couch, staring at your phone, half-watching TV.
But there’s a difference between collapse and true rest.
Collapse: You’re drained, scrolling endlessly, numbing out, but not really feeling better.
True Rest: You’re intentionally slowing down, doing something that helps your body, mind, or spirit recover.
The difference isn’t about doing more. It’s about intention.
True rest could be:
Lying under a blanket and actually letting yourself feel safe there
Sitting outside for five minutes and noticing the wind on your face
Taking a bath and letting the day melt away with the steam
Rest doesn’t have to be fancy. It doesn’t have to take hours. But it does need to be chosen.
Why Unplugging Matters
Even if you’re lying down, your brain can still be “on.”
Notifications ping. Texts pile up. Instagram shows you yet another “happy couple” or “perfect family vacation.” The news delivers another heavy headline.
Suddenly, the rest you were hoping for turns into overwhelm.
That’s why unplugging is just as important as resting.
You don’t need to delete every app or disappear for weeks. Start small:
One screen-free hour a day—no phone, no TV, no computer.
“Do Not Disturb” time for naps or quiet evenings.
Social media breaks when the comparison spiral feels too sharp.
Unplugging doesn’t mean cutting people off—it means giving your nervous system a break.
How to Build Rest Into Your Days
Rest doesn’t only happen on vacations or weekends. You can build it into the fabric of your day—little moments that remind your body you are safe, and that you don’t have to run on empty.
Morning: Begin Softly
The first minutes of your day set the tone. Instead of grabbing your phone right away, try:
Drinking a glass of water before you check a single notification
Sitting in silence for two minutes and letting yourself breathe
Opening a curtain and letting sunlight touch your face before you touch your screen
Midday: Pause on Purpose
Even on a busy day, you can pause intentionally—even for five minutes.
Make a cup of tea and sip it slowly (no multitasking)
Step outside, close your eyes, and take five deep breaths
Put your phone facedown and listen to one song start to finish
Evening: Create a Soft Landing
Your nights deserve just as much care as your mornings.
Dim the lights an hour before bed
Put your phone in another room while you wind down
Journal a single sentence (“Today, I…”) to clear your mind before sleep
Rest doesn’t have to mean hours of doing nothing—it can mean tiny rituals that add up to real restoration.
Giving Yourself Permission to Rest
This might be the hardest part—not the rest itself, but allowing it.
If you’ve been the strong one, the caretaker, the fixer, resting might feel selfish.
But here’s the truth: rest isn’t selfish—it’s survival.
You don’t need to “earn” your rest by exhausting yourself first. You don’t need to justify it with how much you accomplished.
You are allowed to say, “I’m tired. I need to stop for a while.”
Say it again until you believe it:
“Rest is not selfish.”
“Rest is part of my healing.”
“I am allowed to pause.”
Resting Doesn’t Mean You’ve Quit
Sometimes, rest gets tangled up with fear. We think: If I stop, I’ll lose my momentum. I’ll stay stuck forever.
But rest isn’t quitting—it’s refueling.
Think about how marathon runners take water breaks. No one accuses them of “not really running.” They stop, they drink, they breathe—and then they keep going.
Your healing is the same. You can pause. You can lay down the weight for a moment. You can unplug—and when you pick it up again, you’ll be stronger for it.
Practical Ways to Rest & Unplug (Even If You Struggle With It)
If the idea of “just resting” makes you twitchy, you’re not alone. Here are some gentle, doable entry points:
Physical Rest Ideas
Take a short nap with no alarms and no guilt
Stretch slowly on the floor—no goals, no “workout,” just movement
Wrap up in a soft blanket and breathe for three minutes
Mental Rest Ideas
Turn off the news for the day
Put on calming music or nature sounds and close your eyes
Give yourself permission to leave texts or emails unanswered until tomorrow
Emotional Rest Ideas
Spend five minutes writing your feelings (or just scribbling) in a journal
Hug a pet, a pillow, or yourself (yes, really)
Watch something silly, not serious—a show that makes you smile
Unplugging Prompts
“What’s one hour today I can go screen-free?”
“What app always leaves me drained? Can I delete or log out for the weekend?”
“Can I switch my phone to Do Not Disturb for a few hours tonight?”
Resting isn’t “perfecting your self-care routine.” It’s pausing the noise long enough for your body to catch up to your soul.
Creating Your Own “Rest Kit”
One of the most practical ways to make rest easier is to prepare for it on a good day—so that on the hard days, you don’t have to think.
Your Rest Kit might include:
A weighted blanket for deep, calming pressure
Herbal teas (like lavender or chamomile) for slowing down
A soft journal and pen for unloading thoughts before bed
A scented candle or essential oil roller for a small ritual
Blue light–blocking glasses for evening screen time, if you can’t unplug completely
A weighted eye mask for deeper relaxation
The Ripple Effect of Rest
Here’s what happens when you actually give yourself permission to rest:
Your body heals better. Stress chemicals drop. Your immune system resets.
Your mind clears. Problems that felt overwhelming feel a little less tangled.
Your emotions soften. You can meet yourself—and the people around you—with more patience.
And maybe the most important ripple: you start to trust yourself again.
When you rest, you send yourself a quiet but powerful message:
“I am worth slowing down for.”
If you’ve been waiting for someone to tell you it’s okay to rest—here it is.
Put your phone down for an hour. Say no to one thing today. Wrap yourself in something soft. Breathe.
Your healing doesn’t require constant motion. Sometimes, the next brave step is simply to stop.
Sign up to receive your 7-Day Clarity Journal and tuck it into your Rest Kit—a journal that waits patiently for you on the days you unplug and need words to meet you gently.
I know how loud the world can feel when you’re hurting. I know how tempting it is to stay plugged in—scrolling, distracting, numbing—just to avoid sitting in the stillness. I promise you I know this all too well.
But I also know this: stillness can be where the healing begins.
You don’t need to fix everything today. You don’t need to keep proving your strength by never stopping.
You are allowed to pause. You are allowed to unplug. You are allowed to rest.
And you will be amazed at how much lighter everything feels when you do.
